in class i’m used to sitting in the back and making all these smartass comments under my breath
now i’m in the front though so when our attractive instructor drops something and says ‘ah, fuck me!’ and i say ‘maybe later’ he hEARS ME AND LAUGHS GODFUCKING FUCK
the saga continues today in physics when our instructor asks ‘and how fast does light travel?’ and i whisper ‘hella’ and the kid next to me fucking loses it
So there’s only one channel in this motel,
This morning while I was getting ready I was watching Sesame Street.
They were doing this bit where some clown was trying to wash his hands but kept washing his feet or his elbows and Elmo would go, “no mister noodle, your HANDS!” and all the tv kids would laugh.
Around the fourth or fifth time he couldn’t find his hands, I heard a grown man yell from somewhere else in the motel, “GODDAMMIT, MR. NOODLE.”
LITERALLY MY FAVORITE STORY ON ALL OF TUMBLR.
GUYS AT WORK WE WERE DOING A GLASS PAINTING PROJECT AND MY DESIGN WAS THIS
THATS GALLIFREYAN FOR “FUCK BITCHES, GET MONEY.”
PLOT TWIST 2: IT’S GONNA BE ON DISPLAY IN MY CITY’S ART GALLERY
this is my most reblogged text post
hahaha can you imagine the doctor strolling into that city art gallery and doing a double take at that